OK so, i go to my dressing room and memorize my lines. .  Oh, and I forgot to tell that you that before I left NYC, my boyfriends brother told me that I should eat a lot of vegetables because I'm going to be under a lot of stress. I took him literally and ate broccoli for breakfast, lunch and dinner. The only time I came out of my dressing room to get more broccoli. I walked by the Lunch area where they were all eating and Faith asked me if I spoke any Italian and I said "Excellante" and they all laughed; and I was like "Stop she's gonna kill me" and scurried back to my dressing room. Finally, it was time,I'm like a rock, nothing is going to sway me. While we are waiting for them to call action I was talking to Pat FInn, he was such a nice guy and I was so nervous that at one point I farted so loud. It was as if I left my body and he left his. Then a few minutes later we both re entered out bodies as if nothing had happened and did the run through, and I nail it!  Faith Ford flies across the room and high fives me.  I leave feeling so proud of myself. Well, that night I go to a movie screening. My agent was supposed to meet me there. She doesn't show up until the movie is over and the lights are coming up. She walks in the door and she looks horribly stressed. I thought she should have some broccoli, it will change her life. I also had the thought that she must be late because one of her clients must be having a terrible problem. Well, normally we would hang around and talk to all the suits but this night, she pulled out to her car threw it in reverse and parked on the street. She sat up on her knees and said "the Murphy Brown thing isn't going to work out." I felt my stomach drop out. I was horrified and relived at the same time. I knew it wasn't right and I knew there was no way I could change how Candace felt about me but I was soo sad that I had made the decision to do her show instead of the other, and that there was nothing i could do about it. I was powerless over her but not powerless over myself. My attorney called and as i was convulsing and crying I said to him in dead serious voice, "i think i know why I got fired" He said "why?" I said,  "I farted on Pat Finn!" And we all laughed for like 10 straight minutes. Well, needless to say I flew home to NYC for the weekend and pulled myself together only to have to fly back on Monday to look for a writer for my Development deal.  I had to go back on the lot where Murphy Brown was filmed 4 days later. I did it. I met with Sam Simon and Rhea Pearlman's sister. They wanted me to do a show with a mechanical pig. I was sold until i spoke to my agent and lawyer. They literally had to exercise me. Turns out Sam was pissed at the head of CBS because he didn't pick up one of his shows so he was going to use me to get back at him. Nice Huh?  As I look back on that situation I am very proud of the way I handled myself. I also took all the strength that I gained from that experience and used it to propel me forward. You see, if I had lay with the dogs like she was trying to get me to do, it would have held me back I would have used the experience as a way to hurt myself. Instead I rose above it and she had to see me  last weds night:)  She gets to be her, and I get to be me.  It's funny, because before I saw her on the street I had been out with my friend Mark the cop. And he was like" Sue you know what  makes you so hot?" Of course he said my butt first, lol, but then he said,  "the way you take care of yourself, and don't let anyone treat you poorly." I mean, he's a cop!!! He's knows too, because he used to pick me up in the air all the time and I asked him not to and he LOVED IT!!! You know the coolest part of it all? If C andace were to apologize I would forgive her:) Aw heck, I forgive her without the apology:)