My phone rang around 7:30pm last night. It was my friend Violet, she was really upset. Violet owns a restaurant in the Meat Packing District and her customer of ten years, dropped dead yesterday. She called wondering what the meaning of life is. I wrestle with that question everyday.  She was uncomfortable with how upset she was. I comforted her and told her that she had every right to be sad. The man  ate in her restaurant 3 to4 times a week for ten years.

As I'm wiring this it's coming to me. That is the meaning of life. To feel your feelings and to not be ashamed of them. To not judge yourself. Sometimes the feelings are excruciating, but if you don't feel them the get repressed and when you repressed the bad feelings the good ones have to go as well.

I was having lunch with her last week when a man walked in and V asked him if he wanted his table. Apparently he sat at the same table all the time and we were sitting in it. He smiled and said "no worries."

He died a week later. Maybe he was telling us something. Maybe he had no more worries maybe he was ready to be zapped.

I think the meaning of life it to grow and feel and love and get angry and heal and do it all over again and again.

I think the meaning of life is to accept that we are all going to get zapped, and the sooner we accept it the sooner we can get to the business of living because it's not until you are not afraid to die that you are truly free to live.