Oh boy, I had a good laugh this morning. Â I'm still laughing!!! So, yesterday I'm supposed to do a radio show to promote my show in Boston. They tell me they need to call me on a land line, I don't have a land line, so I asked my old lady friend down the hall if I can use hers. She's 89 and Â she she always tells me her whoosie whatsy is hanging out when she can see my hip or my stomach. She, mind you, opens the door in her underpants sometimes.
One time she asked me what was on her cell phone, she yells (froggy voice) Â "SUUUUUUUUE what's on my phone?" It was text from some porno site. Â I said "stop showing your whosie whatsy and they'll Â stopÂ texting, they can probably see in the window."
Lately, she's had me doing lots of things for her, like getting her converter box for the TV and helping her renew her drivers license. So, I didn't think a lot about asking if I could use her land line.
Well, the call was supposed to be at 10am yesterday. She was up at 6:30am getting ready for it. She called all her friends and told them not to call between 10 and 10:30. Needless to say, like always with show business, there was a mix up and the call never came. She slept for like two hours after. She doesn't like change.
She doesn't like change so much, that my friend Kristen Johston (3rd rock) tried to help her change her light bulbs one day, (cause she's tall) and she literally almost past out.
Well, I cleared up the mix up and they called today. I told her 50 times, if the phone rings, I'll get it. She said, "will they ask for Sue Costello?" Â I said it doesn't matter because I'm going to get it. She asked "so, you'll answer it?" I said "yes, unless you want to be on the radio?" She said "oh it will be right on the radio?" I said "yes that's why I'm going to answer." She said "ok, so if the phone rings at ten o'clock it's going to be for you and I won't answer." I said "correct."
After we got that completely cleared up, the phone rang at 10am I answered and so did she. She proceeded to cough incessantly into the phone for 5 minutes. The radio host was like, "what is that? Sue are you throwing your voice?" "Are you smoking Marlboroughs? What is that?" LOLOLOLOL
I tried so hard to signal to her to hang up, but she was too busy staring into the phone and coughing. So I told him. I laid it all out there. I don' t have a land line so I had to use my old lady friends. He laughed so hard. So much for the mystique Â of Â superstardom.
Who cares, we all laughed and it made my day. I like my littleÂ old lady friend. Who, by the way, is back to sleep after all the excitement.