a fear of success for me. It feels exactly the same. I want to control it,  I want to keep in the air, I want to keep it from crashing. I want a direct flight.  I dont want any turbulence. I don't want delays I want the service to be impecable. I want first class. I want a pillow, i want to sit by the exit sign so i can get out quick.  I want to be completely comfortable so i have no fear suspended in the air like that.  All my life i have had this dream about a plane not being able to take off or it takes off and lands right away. I have had success in my life before but, I coudln't feel it and i think because I couldnt feel , I couldn't sustain it.   My Past kept creeping up and pulling me down, or my interpretation of the past.  It felt like everytime something good happened something bad would happen. And because i believed that, I manifested it; or found eveidence to make it appear true.  I unconciously decided not to have any good things happen.  But that didnt work either because i had created my own living grave. I was doing nothing, for fear that something bad would happen. Then i was stuck with the dilema of not being personally satisfied, so i had to learn to dig out my past and let it go.  I had to realize that  Good things were there for the taking all along but i chose not to pay attention to the bad. I had to ask my self honestly how am i going to fly if i can't let go?   A plane cannot take off if there is too much baggage right?  Or it takes off and crashes.  I thought I was supposed be able to let go of all my fear but  But a plane doesn't  completely let go, you have to have a sound info structure to hold you. I tried surfing last summer and i was so freaked out by the strap you had to put around your leg. I almost didn't surf because i thought it would get in my way. I overcame my fear of the strap and got on my belly and rode the wave for a few minutes until a wave hit me and i tumbled. My surfboard went flying but not far because i had it attached to my foot.  I felt like a million bucks all day because it felt so good to let go and  to come to terms with the strap around my leg.  I realized that thing that i thought was getting in my way, was the exact thing that was making it safe enough for me to surf. I GET IT!!!  Flying isn't always comfortable but the rewards are amazing because it gets you to a different destination than when you started.  Fear is there for a reason and you can use it in a healthy way to support your flight. Feel the fear and do it anyway!!!!!!!!